Someone showed me the finger today. In Glasgow! Of all places!
Imagine my surprise.
There was a man, he tripped, I laughed, he turned round and up went his middle finger. Like it was my fault he was a clumsy eejit.
Everyone else saw the crack in the pavement and walked over it. The man with the white stick tapped it and walked around it. OK I'll come clean there was no blind man but you get my point. Everyone else saw the danger, took steps to avoid it but not this joker. He trips, turns round and goes FUCK YOU, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE LAUGHING AT!
What happened to humour? People used to see the funny side when they tripped. When I was a a kid if you tripped, you laughed at yourself. You'd replay the incident, and laugh while everybody else laughed. Now people can't take a joke any more. Its no more 'look at me', now its 'how dare you laugh at me, look at my finger!'
Truth is at first I felt bad for laughing. It wasn't like a belly laugh, it was more an uncomfortable snigger that I did try to hold in. After seeing the finger though I was glad I laughed at the tosser.
But it struck me afterwards, who invented the finger? How come we know who invented the television but we don't know the name of the person who first used their middle digit to show their displeasure. And how come it took off? Did they try other things first? Was it like a trial and error approach to find some that that was universally approved by the masses?
And while we are it - who invented the kiss? Were they in any way related to the person who saw an egg come out of a hen's bum and thought I'm going to eat one of those? How come we don't know these peoples names? Surely these people have had much more influence on human progress than the first people to climb Everest or reach the South Pole......